I'M NORMALLLLL PLEASE DATE MEEEEE

[screwreality]

[SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY! Full of snowbanks and sunshine and ~ROMANCE~. Victorian gents wander around with their ladies. Victorian hobos holler at prostitutes for discounts. Forgetful idiots swarm flower shops for last-minute attempts at getting flowers before they go home and get murdered by their wives.

IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY, YOU BASTARDS! Spam your fellow taggers! Play hard to get and stop responding to everyone but your personal favorite! Sob and eat ice cream while watching your inbox stay empty! CELEBRATE WITH ALL OF YOUR SPIRIT!]

Comments

[inblood]

[Well, Touya hasn't been out much since his arrival several weeks ago - shifts in space and time take some getting used to. But he's finally venturing out today! He's mildly baffled by all the couples and flowers, but isn't going to approach anyone about it.

He can be found either walking alone through the streets (at varying degrees of "completely lost", but enjoying himself nonetheless) or sitting on a bench or leaning against a wall, watching people and their partners and their flowers mill about. He might be accompanied by a large pink creature at any given time.]

[birdenesque]

[Those who make the mistake to go to the park find a beautiful scenery, untouched snow and quiet couples and it really is a wonderful place.

Except for one area. In one area is a girl, milling in the snow nearby a pile of bottles and a box. From afar, it's difficult to see what she's doing. From up close, she's dumping something red and viscous from the bottles and making some large pattern in the snow. But, like crop circles, it's impossible to see unless you were in the sky.

You know, like birds.

Just try to ignore how much the stuff she's dumping looks like blood.]

[anovelidea]

[And, while you're reading this, you can see the exact moment the observers get bored writing interesting things for characters who aren't doing anything.

Those observers are now given the opportunity to hang out with a bitch.]

[leviathaned]

[You know what, fuck it. Here is a giant walking rewrite, tied directly to the fragment of the world. Bordering dangerously close to a protaganist, even.

And also counting coins from the last time he got paid.]

[anovelidea]

[And, conveniently, one of the coins falls from his hands and rolls away. It'd normally roll of somewhere into the street, or down a gutter, or rolls to be stepped on by a single black high heel.

The owner of said shoe smiles up at Sei like it's a pleasant morning.] Good morning, child.

[screwreality]

[CONTRARY TO THE ACCOUNT USED TO MAKE THIS POST, HE DOESN'T WANNA TALK TO YOU.

GO AWAY

dammit ajimu let him back in already]

[hairpine]

[.... :( but

what if I want to though]

-- Kumagawa!

[virinosa]

[A familiar person walks by the alleyway!

And then backtracks.

And then peers in.]

...Kumagawa? [DUDE WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN THEY WERE JUST TELLING HIM NOT TO WORRY ABOUT IT.]

[alethiological]

[And this one's only for Kisha, sorry guys.]

[zenithrewinder]

[Same with this one HAHA]

[capslockbomber]

[And to everyone else stupid enough to be outside with all these crazy fuckers, the only nice person is hanging out near the Thames and talking to a small group of black crabs about stock market prices. They respond with clicks and chirps every so often.

Your only sane person in the city, everyone.]

[apologizeagain]

[The only sane person in the city sure has riveting conversations.

Somewhere behind and to the right of the Crab Whisperer stands Sae, hands in his pockets and as bundled up as he could manage. And just as whiny as ever.]

What are you guys even talking about now?

[leviathaned]

[Sei's working, are you kidding? He makes mad money on Valentine's.

As it is, he's on a corner smoking for a second before looking for another place to basically hang until he's hired, if someone's been looking for him.]

[fliesbynight]

[Your friendly neighborhood magician is stalking around as usual but now she's handing out flowers with her fliers about the Magic Guild! Mainly because she stole the flowers from various gardens whatever. IT'S THE SPIRIT OF VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!

Naturally this means she is harassing anyone and everyone who walks near her.]

[immortelle]

[Before Garry frolics off to get a girlfriend, he can be found looking for the perfect flowers!!!

OR IF YOU'RE IB

He is sitting with you in a cafe and he has bought you - still meaning Ib because he luff her - the biggest most awesome chocolate drink he could and cookies!]

[leviathaned]

[Hey garry here's a giant. Who just handed you a giant-ass boquet.]

This is for someone special, yes?

[Sei why are you working at the florists.]

[fleuri]

[THIS IS THE BEST CHOCOLATE DRINK AND COOKIES EVER.

--That is. Ib's leaning forward on their little table at the cafe, reaching for another cookie, when she remembers something important! Something she's forgotten to tell Garry, but realizes she really should say!

So she smiles, still halfway to said cookie, and says,] Happy Valentine's Day, Garry.

[virinosa]

[This is a man carrying a dark ball of shadows with a pretty bow tied around it.

Also he's handing black roses to certain people. They don't ever quite seem to realize what they've gotten. Maybe you'll receive one?]

[hairpine]

[AFTER GETTING OUT OF THE TOOLSHED AND MAKING SAD FACES AT THE MAID]

-- Oh, Mr Liam! Happy St Valentine's Day!

Here have new character

[threemiracles]

[At some point during the night or morning, a meteor streaked across the sky, very large and very close, though it didn't seem to actually land anywhere. Carry on. It's just something that tends to happen when Jirachi appears.

There's a new young girl in town today, a vision in blue against the snowy city. She looks starstruck, to be totally honest, practically dancing through the streets as she watches happy couples going about their dates. Snow, and flowers, and happy people everywhere... Jirachi likes this millennium. She doesn't bother to stifle the occasional laugh, nor does she hesitate to cheerfully greet anyone who passes within a few feet of her.]

Good morrow!

[virtasallan]

[Here you can find one elven girl who has absolutely no idea what Valentine's Day even is. What she does know, however, is that it's awfully fun!

Merrill can be found flitting about from place to place in the city, holding flowers she probably didn't pay for.

Whoops.]

[leviathaned]

[Guess who just appeared out of just about nowhere? That's right, this dude.]

...Merril.

[apologizeagain]

[If you were to stumble upon a certain alleyway, short and narrow, hidden between two busy buildings, you might just hear a quiet voice. A quiet, whiny distressed voice, its owner cursing and complaining to himself.

Upon going further inside, you might find said owner standing huddled up against one of the walls, standing very, very still.

It's very, very cold.

And getting back home where it's warm is effort.]

[fleuri]

[For a nine year old, Valentine's Day is mostly about the sweets.

And that's likely just what you'll find!

A nine year old. With sweets!]

[dead_sexing]

[Stepping out of one of the more fashionable clubs for gentlemen, this eligible bachelor is wearing a red carnation in his buttonhole.]