Intermediate Library Science

[theworst]

[So Jeff and Britta are in a library, in a study room, with books spread across the table. It's oddly nostalgic, except there are five other people missing. Britta's face is scrunched up as she reads over one trying to find something in there to quiz Jeff about to help him in his studying]

How many laws do you really need to know to be a lawyer? Can't you just sing Witchy Woman and win the jury over or whatever it is that you do?

[they seriously need Annie, because this thing called studying is hard]

Comments

[bedheaded]

[He takes something from his pocket and holds it out to her.] Pocket mirror? Or should I ask the server to turn down the lights?

[theworst]

[her eyes glare from behind the menu] No! [and then she sinks down again as the waiter approaches, pushing some more hair in front of her face]

[bedheaded]

[Jeff just smiles at the waiter.] I'll have the Fattoush salad with grilled chicken, and my friend here will have a cucumber with laban salad.

[And he flashes that smile back at Britta when the waiter is gone and it's too late for Britta to change the order.] Is that okay, Britta? Yoghurt's good for your skin.

[theworst]

[grumbles, and plays with her utensils now that there is no menu to hide behind]

It's fine. And my face is fine, even if there are a few wrinkles here or there. It happens. It's a testament to how much life I've lived.

[she lifts her gaze to meet Jeff's, doing her best to sound defiant]

I. Do. Not. Care.

[bedheaded]

Great. Then am I paying, or are we going Dutch? Where is that phrase from, anyway? Oh well. Fair warning: if I'm buying tonight, you're going to have to pay tomorrow. [Why does he have no money.] It's like being twenty-one again...

[theworst]

[still grumbling and quieter and withdrawn] Do you even have your own money yet? [playing with some strands of hair in front of her face]

[bedheaded]

I pawned off the batteries in my blackberry. [Which is sad, but they were going to die eventually, and then he'd have a dead blackberry AND no money, so he compromised.] Now all I need is to meet an idiot with a criminal charge in a bar and I'm back on my way to dominating the legal profession.

[theworst]

[she looks up at him, genuinely surprised] You sold your blackberry battery? I didn't know you did that. [she isn't even trying to hide the hint of concern there either, because she does know how important that is to him] We have enough money, you didn't need to do that.

[bedheaded]

Britta, it's fine. The battery was running low anyway. It had maybe an hour left. This way I turned a profit on it. Anyway, I hear this Mikado guy can use magic to...

Sorry, I had to accept that I was about to say this sentence. There's some guy named Mikado who can use magic to make some kind of magic Victorian Internet with unlimited batteries. God, that sounds so stupid. What kind of place is this?

[theworst]

[she opens her mouth to say something, but the waiter comes with their food. She's silent until he leaves, and then she's about to start again, but seems to change focus as she starts playing with her food]

[her frown transforms into a challenging smirk] So Columbo, how long will it take you to con this guy into letting you in on his magical phone network?

[bedheaded]

I resent being called a con; I'm not. I'm just a very self-assured person who is good at convincing people to trust me as much as I do.

[theworst]

But do you really trust yourself, Jeff?

[bedheaded]

Yes.

[theworst]

[leans across the table and pats his hand. She lets her hand linger on top of his] Good to know. I'll make sure to store that in my memory banks.

Okay, let's rewind and rephrase. How long do you think it will take you to make this guy trust you as much as you trust yourself and give you access to his super special magical unicorns and rainbows phone network?

[bedheaded]

I haven't met him yet, so I don't know. But soon. Do you have yours?

[theworst]

Why would I waste my time on some lame magic phone?

[considering she really didn't have anyone to call, but she'll leave that part to herself]

[bedheaded]

I assumed so you could send me annoying pictures of your cats dressed up in stupid clothing, but maybe I was wrong, and you don't need it to contact me in case of an emergency, either.

[theworst]

I guess if you got me one, I wouldn't throw it away, but it's not like I'm looking for one or anything.

[plays with her food, moving it around the plate, but not really eating much]

[bedheaded]

[He doesn't object to what she is doing, but he is thinking about the money he doesn't have, and how long they can make this food last if they bring it home with them but don't have a fridge, and some part of him decides that it really, really, really misses being rich.]

I'm going to bluff my way into a job tomorrow. I'm pretty much ready.

[theworst]

Really? Did you get your wig yet? We should go wig shopping! We'll get you all the powdered old timey wigs. [she wonders if they sell little cat versions. Kitty barristers seems adorable]

[bedheaded]

Sorry, but wig shopping isn't on the itinerary. I'm not going to work as a lawyer. I'm going to get myself a position as a consultant. It's not as well-paying, but it's easier to get into and good enough for now.

[theworst]

You're just not going for a lawyer job because you don't want to wear the wig.

[bedheaded]

I'm not going for a position as a lawyer because I don't have enough information to pull it off yet. But I will when I do.

[theworst]

A likely story. And if that's the case, then we can still go wig shopping now, and you'll be ready to sport it when you lawyer up.

[bedheaded]

Wow, you really are stupid with your money. You do realize we shouldn't be spending any cash until we have it?