gocirclegogo | (no subject)

I am an expert at all contests, especially those involving sexy girls. 'Bring it on.'

'Good!' I could win this easy but it isn't any fun without the risk of loss. Answer three questions and you can claim your prize!

Number one! What are the three questions all mystery stories must answer? Even if you don't word them exactly right, I'll give you the point if you can get the general idea.

That's easy!

They have to tell you who did it, why they did it, and how they did it!

'Good!' Trivia Bonus fact! [Chopsticks twirling out of nowhere.] The whodunit is the oldest question and often considered at odds with the howdunit, with novels often being classified based on which one they focus on. Most detective fiction doesn't focus on the whydunit but you can't neglect the heart! Motive matters!

Number two! [Holding up both chopsticks for the number.] Two classic elements of the mystery genre both involved 'closed' scenarios. Can you name them or do you give up? I'll keep the previous condition of getting the gist of it!

I would give up to try to make you let me fondle you out of pity, but I can't let myself lose this competition.

From my experience with manga, anime, and action dramas, I'd say you need a closed setting or room or whatever and a closed group of people.

[swinging his arms around her neck to hold onto her]

Is that it? Did I get it?

[Erika giggles.] Correct! A closed ring of suspects and a closed setting or closed room murder are included in most mysteries. I would have accepted either but you named both. Trivia Bonus Fact! There's even a sub-genre just for English country home closed settings. In pop culture, that image of a grand manor house cut off from the world with a group of shady people is probably the most immediate thought summoned by a murder mystery.

That leaves the final challenge! How difficult should I make it?

I don't know. Do you think I can handle a really difficult challenge from someone like you?

It is doubtful. But I might have a good final question. First tell me, have you ever read And Then There Were None?

[he shakes his head no, although he probably is familiar at least with the tropes from it, even if he doesn't know the origin]

[Erika figures that much, even saying so.]

Even so, the clichés are so overused that you probably have seen the story a hundred times. So this last question will be a test of your pop culture knowledge and reasoning skills!

[Holding three fingers up.] Final round! Number three! And Then There Were None is one of the most famous mystery novels with a unique twist ending. No one lived to speak of what happened and yet the police knew everything. Somehow, though, this crime is unsolveable.

So tell me, Masaomi-kun, how could anyone know the events of that day, on that island, if there were no survivors? What sort of ending allowed this perfect crime?

[he considers this and considers his own trope knowledge]

I'd say it would have to be something like a murder-suicide pact, with a suicide note left behind.

[a pause] Or surveillance videos if that kind of thing is a possibility in that setting.

[Erika considers this answer with all the seriousness that a trivia challenge for groping really doesn't deserve.

Decide not to accept it and enjoy a victory? Or accept it and satisfy curiosity?

A loss might be a loss no matter what but a victory over Kida here wouldn't really be that fun. And curiosity is always enjoyable, no matter how small.]

Hm...for that logic, I will allow it and concede a victory to you. You are correct, after all, that it was a suicide for the final person with a note left behind. To be most specific, it was put in a message bottle and eventually found. It is too old for surveillance videos but technology is ahead of the mystery genre. Modern mysteries may yet have room to grow.

[Dramatic flourish, holding up one finger.] That concludes Furudo Erika's Mystery Trivia Challenge! The winner is Kida Masaomi! The prize for being an amateur detective is investigating the scene of Furudo Erika's chest! What shall you do with such a rare opportunity?

A message in a bottle? Do those things even work? I always thought they were just a device that would never apply in real life anyway. But whatever, of course I won. I told you I would and I did.

[tilts his head, inspecting Erika. He walks over and spreads her arms out, and then walks around her, inspecting her]

Would it be possible to bring in a partner or an expert consultant to help, or is this a solo investigation?

[Biting down a response to the first part. Just mentally filing away a better time to mention the significance of message bottles in the lives of his friends. No bitchy remarks for now.]

Hmm...? Well well, how could I argue against an interesting turn of events? If you need a hand in the investigation, it isn't unheard of with even great detectives.

I think a hand or two would definitely get to the bottom of this chestacular mystery of yours.

[he considers where he can take her. Going to Ange's place doesn't seem a good idea. As much as he's trying to stay away from Izaya, his - ooh]

There are some private rooms around the Church of Martel. Since you're such a good friend with the Chosen, that will work. We can grab Mairu-chan on our way.

[he takes her hand and starts heading towards Ange's place to pick up Mairu]

[Allowing herself to be dragged and maybe a little surprised.]

We're not going to go see Zelos, are we?

No, no, that guy has enough brainwashed groupies to keep his hands busy. It's just the only private place I can think of that works for everyone. I have a friend who's missed freely fondling boobs since she got here. It will be fun for her to get to explore and investigate your body.

[And so they reach Ange's hotel. Where Mairu is busy reading porn. But she opens the hotel room for them, bouncing idly in place.]

Welcome home Kida-senpai! And...?

[With a curtsey.] Furudo Erika. I occasionally spend time at your brother's home, so I know you but it is a pleasure to meet you.

[Kida rolls his eyes at Erika's curtsy. With one hand still holding Erika's hand, he grabs Mairu's hand with his free hand] I brought you a present, but you can't open it here, so we'll have to go somewhere else. Come on.

[and with that, he will start to drag them to Zelos' church.]

Eh?

[She's pulled unresistingly along, looking from Kida to Erika. Still has her porn at least!]

Nice to meet you Furudo-san. Ne, neh, senpai, what is it?

[Erika doesn't mind and gives a smile to Mairu.]

I assume you are the partner Masaomi-kun has chosen for our erotic detective work.

[to Mairu] It's a surprise, you'll see when we get there.

[to Erika] She is! Believe it or not, Mairu-chan is even more of an expert and fan of the female anatomy than I am.

Erotic detective work?

[You have all her interest, Erika.] What kind of mystery of the female body do you need my help exploring?

[Giggling.] Hard to believe someone enjoys women more. But I believe Masaomi-kun wants that to be a surprise? But he did work very hard to get this case, so you should treat it with the utmost respect and seriousness.